Here we are, as the ass crack of dawn and Ken has just fled the house with his pants on fire. 17 year in the military and he has perfected the art of fleeing “pants on fire” style. I shall be alone for the next three days and I would like to take this opportunity to tell the Army that I HATE YOU. We were informed less than 48 hours ago that there would be a 3 day field exercise starting today and everything has been pandemonium since, trying to meet the ridiculous packing and prep lists that always goes out with these things no matter how much notice he gets. In his case it is particularly awesome because we are still fighting this battle where they insist he still has gear issued to him HE DOES NOT, because he turned it in back at Ft Bragg when we left, and apparently proving that 200 times doesn’t get him issued new gear any faster or clear up the confusion.
In October his unit is supposed to be mobilizing SOMEWHERE for an entire year, but no one knows whether or not that’s actually happening, so we are playing the hurry up and wait game getting no information pretty much weekly. But we are all of a sudden being commanded to GET OUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER BY AUGUST because orders could be issued by September. “AFFAIRS” mean things like our wills, powers of attorney, legal matters, regular deployment stuff. Been there done it before, so I’m already in “deployment mode” in my head, but I do not like the jerking around game with no information still, even though I am used to it by now. I love the urgency of these new commands without orders too, because JAG will not see us without orders for these things (although apparently they will make exceptions with memorandums from commanders, but they don’t tell you these things up front. It’s one of the joys of being military for so fucking long, you LEARN how to pull teeth to get information)
I got an email roundup from a military source I subscribe to for the latest and greatest of military news and they sent me an email headlined:
“DARPA Unveils Advanced Humanoid Robots”, and it’s probably now my favorite and most sad thing to make fun of ever.
“KEN GET IN HERE, THE MILITARY EITHER JUST BUILT THE TERMINATOR FOR REAL, OR LIBERTY PRIME FROM FALLOUT 3! YOU’RE NO LONGER NEEDED AS A SOLDIER!”
When we got the field day requirements, and bullshit list of things to do by next month I said “Email them back and tell them you are no longer reporting to work as they now have HUMANOID ROBOTS to do this shit themselves, and your wife is just sick of this shit. Kisses”
This morning my response was “Fuck getting up at 3 am. HUMANOID ROBOTS. It’s where the budget is apparently going anyway, because it’s certainly not in your paycheck.”
Sadly, he still left me. He has to though. He keeps me under pretty good health insurance and with access to all the doctors and treatments I need for the most part. The heartache of letting him go for another whole year just sucks though. He’s my best friend. In every single way. And I’m not looking forward to it at all. We do really well as this military husband and wife team, and we have enjoyed taking the approach of helping soldiers and families in his career (he’s in the medical command, and I was a DoD Army medical civilian) instead of an aggressive soldier approach, but the military is still stressful, exhausting and taxing to deal with all it’s intrusion in every aspect of your life, even when you are perfectly healthy.
So I’m going to drown myself in some indulgences I bought to sustain me through the weekend, mixed in with some veggies for good measure, hang out with the cats, and wait for my soldier to return home. It helps that he does look good in uniform.